There are certain things that keep relationships together and things that tear them apart. You have seen many seemingly happy relationships come to an end. You don’t have to be afraid of that happening to you if you take care of and nurture your relationship. You and your partner may have rough times but if you both want to keep it together, you will. Here are some of the best-kept secrets that happy couples use to keep their relationships strong.
1. Are Realistic
Couples that are happy have a realistic view of a committed relationship. They recognize that the butterflies in the stomach infatuation you experienced when your romance was new won’t last. A deeper, more meaningful relationship will eventually replace it. One that still includes romance. A long-term relationship has ups and downs and expecting that it will be all sunny and roses all the time is unrealistic; happy couples have figured this out.
2. Work on their relationship
Couples in a healthy relationship do not ignore their problems hoping they will go away. They work at making sure any issues or problems that arise are dealt with, and misunderstandings are addressed immediately. Some people believe good relationships just happen naturally, but that is far from the truth. If you want your relationship to succeed, you must work at it on a regular basis. Neglect the relationship, and it will often go downhill.
3. Spend Quality Time Together
There is no substitute for shared quality time. When you make a point of being together, without kids, friends, family or other interruptions, you will form a bond that will get you through life’s rough spots. Time spent together should be doing a shared activity, not just watching television.
4. Give Each Other Space
On the flip side, each partner in a healthy relationship should have interests other than their partner. Spending time apart is an important component of a happy relationship. The strongest relationships are built on allowing each partner their space to do things that make them happy. Missing your partner even for a short time helps remind you how important he or she is to you.
5. Protect And Stand up For Each Other
Even the most perfect relationship with two very loving partners can be torn apart by open or underhanded attacks on one partner. A stereotypical example is the meddling friend or relative who takes the side of one partner and tears down the other behind their back. It could also be coming from another person who has a romantic interest in one of the partners. The partner not being attached will not stand for any attack on their partner and will do whatever it takes to squash the attack. Happy couples have each other’s back and will not allow outside parties to come between them.
6. Get Busy Often
The average American gets busy about two or three times a month. Increasing your romps to once a week generates as much bliss as scoring an extra $50,000 in income, according to researchers from Dartmouth College and the University of Warwick in England. It’s not so much the sex itself that leads to happiness; the frequency is a better marker for a successful relationship. “Couples who like each other end up in bed more often,” says study author Andrew J. Oswald, Ph.D. “And it’s the liking-each-other part that increases the joy.”
7. Agree to Disagree
Sometimes you may have to agree to disagree. If after trying to attempt a compromise or trying to work around the issue and you still can’t come to an agreement, it’s time to agree to disagree. Two people cannot spend years together without having legitimate areas of disagreement. The test of a happy relationship is how they choose to work through such issues, most issues can be solved through compromise, change, or finding it’s just not that important to worry about.
Lack of communication can derail even a good relationship. But if you follow this format for a healthy dialog with your partner, especially when dealing with incendiary topics you may just save your relationship. Listen to your partner’s position, without interrupting him or her. Just listen. When he or she is finished, summarize what you heard him or her say. If you can, empathize with your significant other even though you don’t agree. This will take your partner off of the defensive, and make it easier for them to hear your thoughts and feelings. It’s hard to argue when you use this format, and best of all, you may come up with an understanding or a solution.
9. Honesty is The Best Policy
Without trust and honesty what kind of relationship do you really have? Your partner may not be happy with everything you have to share with them. Better put it all out on the table than to have him or her doubt your honesty. Mistrust is one of the key deal breakers in relationships. Once trust is lost or broken, it can take a very long time to re-establish it in the relationship if ever. The happiest couples are the ones where honesty is as natural as breathing.
10. Respect Each Other
Treat your sweetheart with respect, and you will most likely be treated with respect in return. Regularly reminding them how much they mean to you will enrich your relationship in indescribable ways. Saying “thank you” for the little things that your partner does let them know that you appreciate the things they do for you. Looking your partner in the eyes and saying “I love you,” can brighten their day immensely. Happy couples don’t take each other for granted.