After months (or years) of dating and life as a couple, your guy has finally popped the question and put that ring on your finger. Since then your life has been a whirlwind of dress fittings, premarital counseling and wedding planning. As the big day ticks closer, things get more and more exciting, and it is easy to ignore some warning signs. If your guy displays any of the following, you might want to give the marriage a second thought.
#1. You Do Not See Eye to Eye Financially
Problems with money are a common cause of divorce, so it is important that you and your fiancé be on the same page financially. If you are a saver and he a spender, things could get rocky pretty quickly. Do yourself a favor — pick a time and have an honest discussion about finances long before the wedding.
#2. You Want Kids and He Doesn’t (or Vice Versa)
When he popped the question, you immediately started picking out decorations for the nursery. Before you start planning the birth, you better make sure your future husband shares your love of children. Unless you both want kids, you could be setting yourself up for a big disappointment and a quickie divorce.
#3. You Catch Him Cheating
If you cannot trust him before the wedding, how can you trust him afterward when things get rocky? If you catch your partner cheating before the marriage, you still have time to bail and find someone who knows how to be faithful.
#4. He Has a Porn Addiction
Many couples enjoy watching porn together, and a few blue movies can even enhance your sex life. But if you catch your future spouse watching porn alone or flipping the laptop shut when you walk into the room, you might want to seek some premarital counseling. A porn addiction is a serious matter, and it can cause long-term problems for your marriage.
#5. He Still Carries a Torch for His Ex
If your future husband still talks longingly about his ex, he might not be totally committed to you. There is nothing wrong with getting along with an ex-spouse or lover, especially if there are kids involved, but a lingering obsession or romantic interest is a giant red flag.
#6. Things Have Gotten Violent in the Past
A violent streak or bad temper is a huge red flag in any relationship, especially one that is headed for the altar. If he has ever shown any signs of physical or mental abuse, now is the perfect time to run. Domestic violence is no joke, and there is no excuse for a partner disrespecting or putting his hands on you in anger.
#7. You Are Fighting About the Wedding
If you can’t agree on where to hold the wedding or who to invite, how are you going to agree on buying a home or planning for your future? Planning a wedding can be stressful, but if you do nothing but fight about it that could be a very bad sign.
#8. You Have Doubts About the Wedding
If your inner voice is telling you the wedding is a bad idea, you should pay close attention. If you have more trepidation than are thrilled about your upcoming nuptials, you might want to take a step back and let things progress more slowly. It will be easier to walk away before you are married than after you have walked down the aisle.