Friend, Foe or Frenemy

The formal definition of a “frenemy” is “a person who pretends to be a friend, but is an enemy; a rival with which one maintains friendly relations.” Unfortunately, your enemy many times will come off looking like a loyal friend, someone you can confide in. They will be there for you in your worst times and even provide a shoulder to cry on. All the while relishing in your misery.  Sooner than hopefully later, a frenemy will show their true colors but be on the lookout for friends who exhibit these signs.

A frenemy will always find the negative in any positive situation. They never truly enjoy any positive developments in your life. If something good happens to you, they are usually the first person to sneer and have something negative to say about the situation in the hopes of undermining you.  Sooner than hopefully later, a frenemy will show their true colors but be on the lookout for friends who exhibit these signs.

A frenemy is the friend who likes to “keep it real” by pointing out the negative in the most pristine and seemingly perfect situations. A good frenemy can phrase a put-down in such a way that at first you believe they are actually saying something positive.  But if you rethink what was said, you realize that the comment was negative.

Frenemies don’t have your best interest at heart. Ever wonder how people you really don’t associate with on a personal level know all your business, especially if things are going badly? The common denominator will always be one friend that you both know.  You can thank your frenemy for that because they will be the first to throw you under the bus and portray you in a negative light to anyone who will listen.

Frenemies always feel like they are in competition with you. They will compete with you in the hopes that they can “one-up” you. If you went to a particular upscale restaurant on a date, a frenemy wouldn’t rest until she went to the same restaurant. If you are dating someone who has their shit together, your frenemy will try to find someone who is even better. You just purchased a pair of Jimmy Choo shoes, guess who has a pair the next time you see her? So if your “friend” has to have whatever you have, she’s probably a frenemy.

True friendship is about loyalty, support and unconditional love. A real friend is happy when something good happens to you because they love you and because they know your past struggles, they happily cheer for you. Your real friends don’t have to tear you down to make themselves shine. They should be able to shine on their own and enjoy seeing you glow just as bright as well

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