“He’s Attractive,” I Said to My Husband

When NOT to say you find someone else attractive?

When a non-chain opens up in a small town, it’s usually big news. So when such a non-chain craft brewery with cool lighting and sexy low-slung banquettes opened mere minutes from our house, on a sleepy street otherwise full of offices and banks, my hubby and I were ecstatic. We quickly became regulars.

It just so happens that the owner of this too-cool-for-the-suburbs bar is a good looking guy. And I mean really good-looking. I first noticed it when the hubby and I met my parents at the bar for drinks one evening. My mom kept jerking her head in an awkward way at the owner and mouthing “He’d be cute for your sister, wouldn’t he?” That’s when I saw him the first time and realized, yeah, he’d be good for my sister because he’s really, really good looking.

I must have gawked a little too long because when I tore my eyes from Hot Bar Owner, hubby was looking at me, eyebrows raised. “Seriously, babe?” he said. “Could you be anymore obvious?”

“Well, what do you want me to say, he’s hot! Right, Mom?” But she was already lost in thought, probably already planning my sister and Hot Bar Owner’s wedding. And I found myself continuing to speak and dig myself in deeper: “Like, he’s cute. And he makes beer.”

My mom leaned towards me, keeping one eye on him like a hawk. “He used to live in Australia,” she said.

Well of course he did. I wasn’t surprised by this point. “Does he have an accent?” I asked. “Because, if he has an accent, too, that’s just … come on.” My mom and I had devolved into teenagers again, flailing over the newest boy band sensation.

“Thanks, babe,” hubby said with sarcasm, looking even a little bit–dare I say–hurt by my fascination.

My friend assured me not to worry after I relayed the story to her. “Just because you’re married now doesn’t mean you can’t find other people attractive.”