How to Get Over a Relationship Breakdown

A relationship breakdown is one of life’s hardest experiences.  

At its worst, the pain can be almost as intense and almost as lasting as bereavement. When relationships falter, those involved often feel not only heartbroken but humiliated and rejected as well. And yet this pain can be withstood, no matter how bad it may seem. Approached in the right spirit, you may even emerge stronger and wiser.

1) You must grieve. 

The emotions triggered by a relationship breakdown often resemble those of grief. As with the death of a loved one, you will need time to adjust to their absence. Don’t repress the emotion; cry, scream, and yell. Do whatever you must to release the pain.

2) Learn to be alone.

For some, the end of a relationship brings opportunities for self-exploration and self-growth. Those least able to cope often find it difficult not because they miss their lover but because they cannot face being alone. That is not healthy. Inevitably, such individuals throw themselves into new relationships, often with unsuitable people, simply to avoid loneliness. Instead, try to see this as a chance to grow. Embrace your new life. Get to know yourself before you meet someone new. If possible, get away somewhere different for a week or two; perhaps you could call up old friends, take up a new hobby, or explore a spiritual practice.

3) Learn to like yourself.