Do you keep getting into relationships that don’t last long? Do you feel like the men you date are losers, jerks or they just can’t handle a strong independent woman like you? Don’t worry because you are not alone. Plenty of other women keep getting into short term relationships. In fact, they have totally given up on dating because they feel all the good guys are taken. But here’s the deal:
Good guys are still out there. In fact, we recently gave you a few places where they hang out. However, there’s a high chance you might meet a few guys who want long term relationships but somehow they change their minds along the way. Whatever the case, we have a few tips that will help you stop getting into short term relationships.
Find out what you are doing wrong
Analyze the last three or four guys you dated. Do you notice a particular pattern? For instance, did you sleep with them on the first or second date? Were you the one chasing after them? Did they continue seeing other women but you stuck around hoping they would eventually settle with you? Were they bad boys? Did you have to compromise too much to make them happy?
Unless you sit down and admit your mistakes in your previous relationships, you will keep on getting into short term relationships. Once you identify what you need to change, you’ll find yourself attracting more serious relationship-ready guys.
Follow dating rules
Most women nowadays prefer not to have dating rules but there’s a reason why the divorce rates are higher today than they were before. People don’t want to stick to the old fashioned rules of dating. No, we are not talking about the ones where women were expected to be timid and go along with everything a man said. We are talking about the ones where:
- You should never be in a hurry to get into a relationship
- You should never sleep with a guy too soon
- You should give your love time to manifest and grow
You should always have a set of rules that you are willing to stick to no matter what when dating. If a guy doesn’t want to follow your rules, then you are better off not dating him.
Do you prefer a guy who has a job, isn’t divorced, doesn’t have children, isn’t an addict and treats you the way a lady should be treated? Then put those qualities in your list of standards.
Standards are everything in dating. They dictate what type of men you prefer to date. Make a list of some of the qualities you prefer your man to have and stick to it. And please, be realistic when setting your standards. When you set them too high you will have a hard time finding the type of guy and when you set them too low, you will find yourself dating jerks, players and losers. That’s definitely not what you want.
Your standards will be like a checklist. If you go out on a date with a guy and he doesn’t meet your standards, you should immediately detach yourself. When you combine standards and rules of dating, your love life will get better.
Speaking of standards, don’t ever compromise on them. Think about how many times you’ve said “things will get better once he sees I’m the one for him” or “once we get married I’ll change him”. That’s where you are failing. If a guy is a player, he will never take you seriously if you desperately cling on to him like he’s the last man on earth. If he is a smoker, don’t expect to make him stop smoking once you get married.
There are a few things you can let slide in your list of standards as long as they won’t compromise your safety or harm your relationship in the long run. We are talking about standards like he must have blue eyes or he must know how to cook or he must love kayaking. You get the drift, right?
You no longer need to date time-wasters. Your relationships will get better once you set rules, standards and avoid compromising. Focus your time and energy attracting the right type of guys and things will get much better.