Many people find it hard to understand why a woman would choose to stay in a marriage or a relationship with a man who has cheated on her, or who has a history of extramarital affairs. Yet there are millions of women, who for various reasons, have chosen to stay with a cheating partner. In fact, according to experts up to 75% of couples rocked by infidelity manage to stay together.
These are not the only reasons women remain in relationships with cheaters. There are a myriad of reasons why women stay with cheaters, some that only make sense to the women involved. Below are just a few reasons why women choose to stay with a cheating spouse or partner.
1. The lying has stopped
Women feel better, after everything is out in the open. They believe that with the lying over with, they can begin to repair their marriages.
Infidelity does not instantly cancel out love. A woman may still be very much in love with her husband or boyfriend, despite the fact that he has cheated on her.
3. They blame themselves
Self-recrimination seems to play a big part in why women stay with men who cheat. They blame themselves for their men’s behavior. “What did I do wrong to make him cheat?”
4. Financial reasons
There are women who are unable to, or believe they cannot make it on their own without the financial support of a cheating partner.
It may be more convenient to stay with the cheater for the time being, until certain legal or financial measures have been put into place.
6. For the sake of the children
Some women feel that children should be raised in a two-parent home at all costs.
7. Desire to one up, the other woman
“Hell hath no fury, like a woman scorned” Wives who have been scored, may have the need to prove they won over the other woman. The wife may be hell bent on showing her husband’s mistress, that she was nothing more than a fling, while she, the wife, has the home, children and the good life.
8. Not willing to give up a certain lifestyle
Leaving a wealthy or prominent man may mean that a woman has to give up a lavish lifestyle that includes a luxurious home, fancy car, expensive clothes, and jewelry, exotic vacations and more.
9. Bad timing
The current economic situation, a serious illness, or any number of other problems may mean that leaving the cheater has to be temporarily put on hold.
10. Insufficient proof of infidelity
A woman may feel that she lacks sufficient proof that her spouse or significant other is actually having an affair.
11. Fear of change
Leaving a long-time partner is a life-altering decision. A woman may be afraid to make such a drastic change in her life.
12. Low self-esteem
A woman may have so little confidence in herself that she feels unable to make it on her own.
13. Honoring the marriage vows
Some women take their marriages vows literally, which say: “for richer for poorer, for better or worse, in sickness and in health, till death do us part.” These women take seriously the vows they have made, and desire to obey them, even to the bitter end.
14. Thinking the cheater will change
A woman may truly believe that a husband or boyfriend with a history of cheating will eventually change his cheating ways.
15. To achieve career goals
Remaining in the marriage or relationship with the cheater may be instrumental in the achievement of the woman’s career goals.
16. Hoping counseling will help
If the couple or the cheater himself is getting professional counseling, the woman may be hopeful that this will help.
17. Fear of being alone
Some women simply do not want to live without a man in their life and feel that even a cheating man is better than no man at all.
18. Religious beliefs
Some wives feel that divorcing a cheating husband goes against their religious beliefs.
19. Desire to keep the family intact
There are wives who believe it is important to keep up the illusion of an intact family, despite the fact that their husbands are having an affair.
20. Belief that it will not happen again
A woman may feel that her partner’s infidelity is an isolated incident that will never happen again.
Years ago Ann Landers, in her column would tell wives to ask themselves one important question; “Are you better off with him, or without him”. It could be as simple as a woman looking at her overall situation and deciding she is better off staying. She should never have to explain or defend her decision to family or friends as to why she has chosen to leave or to stay with a man who cheats.
Choosing to leave, or to stay with a cheating spouse or significant other is a very personal matter. Some women will make a spur of the moment decision the minute they find out about the affair. Many times, they regret their choice. For other women, whether to stay or leave is a carefully thought-out decision in which many factors are taken into consideration.
For some women, staying is the right decision. For other women, the right decision may be to leave, but each woman must make her own choice.