Everyone deserves a happy, healthy relationship, but such a relationship is not easy to come by. It takes work from both partners and respect for each other. Below are some things that help contribute to a relationship that you would actually want.
1. Someone who can challenge you.
You should have a partner who knows they can disagree with you and give constructive criticism, so you can learn more about yourself every day and grow. The more you challenge each other, the more you’ll both grow–together.
2. And isn’t afraid to tell you when you’ve gone out of line.
Someone has to call you out for it!
3. But they don’t want to change you, because they love who you already are.
Is there anything better than feeling loved for who you really are?
4. Someone who answers a damn text.
No strange disappearing acts, he actually responds when you send him a message.
5. Someone who respects your differences.
Whether you have different political opinions or bizarre hobbies that they totally don’t get, an awesome partner may just love you even more for those quirks—even if they don’t share your opinion.
6. Someone who supports you in your dreams and goals.
If your own partner can’t be your cheerleader, who can?
7. Someone who makes you feel safe—emotionally and physically.
Someone who loves you should want you to feel cozy and secure with them, like coming home after a long day.
8. Someone whose eyes light up when you walk into the room.
In real life this is a lot more subtle than the movies, but it’s there. Watch for it!
9. A partner who understands the basic premise of compromise.
What a concept!
10. Someone who is honest with both you and with themselves.
It’s one thing to be dating someone who lies to you, but someone who lies to themselves is a whole other can of worms. If they can’t get real with themselves, they can’t get real with you.
11. A partner who is willing to laugh at life sometimes.
Life is hard, and if you can’t find a way to laugh about your struggles together now and then, it’s going to be a pretty grim relationship.
12. And someone who shares your preference of lame inside jokes.
There’s nothing more fun than a bae who thinks your bizarre jokes are actually funny, even if nobody else does.
13. A partner who loves your body in whatever size or shape you love your body in.
Your body is for you, after all.
14. Someone whose arms fit around you like a cozy glove.
Cuddles all day, every day.
15. And someone who knows exactly how to make your toes curl.
Love is even better when there’s awesome sex to be had.
16. Someone who communicates about sex and encourages you to do the same.
You should feel comfortable (kindly) telling your partner what is and isn’t working for you in the bedroom so you can make sure you’re both having a good time. How else is your sex life going to get even more awesome?
17. A bae who trusts you.
It’s important to date someone you can trust, but it’s equally vital that they trust you. Otherwise, you’re in for a world of passive-aggression, false accusations, and disappointment.
18. Someone who won’t try save you from your problems, because they already know you’re the only one who can do that.
You want a partner who will be right by your side to help you save yourself, not someone with such an inflated ego that they think they can rescue you from all of life’s struggles (IF ONLY).
19. A teammate.
At the end of the day, it’s the two of you against the world.
20. Someone who never intentionally makes you feel shame.
People who shame you while telling you they love you are jerks and definitely don’t deserve to get in your pants on a regular basis.
21. Someone who is perfectly imperfect for exactly you.
We all have our flaws, and no matter how hard we try, we’ll never get things exactly right or be perfect partners. What matters is that your partner’s imperfections fit just right with your own, and that you’re never afraid to keep improving.