Giving up old grudges and overcoming old hurts is good for the soul, but moving on is easier said than done. If you have been hurt before, it can be hard to trust again, and even harder to forgive the people who hurt you. In the end, however, forgiving the other person (and yourself) is the key to healing.
#1. Your Defensive Nature
It is easy to get your back up and blame someone else for all your problems. It is much harder to admit your own role in the situation and move on. Every mistake is a learning opportunity, but your defensive nature can make learning the lesson pretty tough. Letting go of that defensiveness is a valuable skill, but not one that comes naturally to most people.
#2. Your Need to Hold a Grudge
It is all too easy to hold a grudge, especially when you have been wronged. Some grudges are justified, but that does not make them any less harmful. Holding on to hold grudges is harder on you than your ex-friend or lover, and the sooner you learn to let it go the better you will feel. So stop treating your grudges like beloved pets and show them the door.
#3. An Inability to Forgive Yourself