If you thought your date couldn’t get any weirder, wait until the waiter drops off the check on the table. Can you believe there was a time when it was automatically assumed it was the man’s role to pay for dates? Things have really changed and in 2015, you can’t really expect what used to work for dates in the 90s to still work. So we are here to let you know who should pay for the first date.
A guy should pay if:
It’s your first date
Real gentlemen always pay on the first date…unless you prefer not to date a gentleman. He should be the one to make the first move when the bill comes. In fact, during your first few dates with him, he should pay and here’s why you should let him:
It’s his chance to prove to you that he’s responsible, established and steady. Only if he shows you these qualities can you tell if he is relationship ready or not. Remember, ladies, first impressions matter. If he doesn’t show you he is a gentleman on the first date, you can be assured he won’t show you on the second or the third date.
He asked you out
Nothing sounds as pathetic as a guy who asks out a girl and then asks her to pay her half of the bill. First of all, she had no plans of going out; he invited her. Second of all, why did he ask her out if he didn’t plan on paying the whole bill? He should have just gone out by himself.
As a rule of thumb, whoever asks the other out should pay for the date. Unless you agreed on it in the first place, the bill shouldn’t be split 50/50 either.
It’s a special occasion
If he suggests you go out and celebrate your birthday, your promotion or some other type of achievement, he should definitely pay for the date. Paying for your date on a special occasion shows that he appreciates you and is proud of what you have accomplished.
So now that we’ve established when a man should pay for a dinner date or any other date, let’s discuss when you should pay for the date.
You should pay if:
You asked him out
This one is rather obvious. If you instigated the date you should pay for it. If you are dating a gentleman, you can be guaranteed he will insist on paying for the date even if you’re the one who asked him out. But you should always carry enough money to cover both of you on your date. Don’t form a habit of relying on the guy to pay for the date if you asked him out.
It’s his special occasion
You should be more than happy to cover for everything if you’ve gone out to celebrate your boyfriend’s birthday or his achievements. If he does it for you it’s only fair if you return the favor. Show him that he’s appreciated and you are proud of what he has accomplished so far.
You should split the check if
You are going steady
If you are casually dating and not serious about each other yet, then all the above rules apply. But if your relationship has moved on to the next level and you are going steady, it’s okay to spit the bill 50/50. If you are already discussing issues to do with finances and bills on a regular basis then you’ve fallen into the steady couple category.
Don’t do this:
Go to the bathroom
If you need to go to the bathroom, don’t go right after you are done with your meal and the waiter has brought the check. It gives the impression you are trying to weasel your way out of paying for the date.
If you insist on paying for the date, you had better be able to pay for it. It would be pretty embarrassing for you if you did the “reach” only to find you don’t have enough cash and you didn’t carry your credit card. Even if you are doing a pretend “reach” you should be prepared to pay for the date even if you don’t plan on paying for it.
Do you think we are right? Who do you think should pay for dinner on a date? We’d love to know what you think. Written by Jackie K.
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